Baytown's Target addict

By Deana Nall
Baytown Sun

Published January 18, 2006

My name is Deana, and I’m a Target-a-holic.

I love Target. I love it so much that last week, I got in trouble for going there so frequently.

“Do you realize you went to Target four times in six days?” My husband bellowed as he reviewed our bank account activity the other day.

Making a mental note to pay for future Target purchases in cash, I explained to him that last week was difficult for me. Take Tuesday, for instance. Our youngest child started Mothers’ Day Out, and I needed to sip on a Starbucks Cafe Mocha while walking around the baby section, crying into newborn outfits I’ll never need to buy again.

“Then how did you manage to spend $43?” he wanted to know.

Oh. That.

I really can’t help it. They have you as soon as you walk in through those big red doors. Immediately, you are in “the Target trap.” To your left is “The 1 Spot,” where everything costs a buck. To your right is Starbucks, where they sell heaven in a paper cup. And I’m supposed to just walk right past all that, go get the baby wipes I need, and then head straight for the checkout?

I don’t think so. Here’s my usual route: First Starbucks, then The 1 Spot. Then I look at clothes for me, jewelry, and clothes for my kids, toys and all the cool home decorating stuff. Oh, I also love the scrapbooking aisle. And I don’t scrapbook.

I’m not the only woman who has been hooked on Target. One of my favorite memories of my friend Jennifer Watson was the night we decided to “stop by” Super Target in Seabrook on the way home from Bunco. We wandered around for a while, thoroughly enjoying ourselves, before Jennifer checked her watch. It was midnight. We had been there for nearly three hours. Jennifer and I had reached the ultimate in Target shopping: We had achieved a Target nirvana.

One thing about us Target addicts is that we’re all in this together. Want to know if you’re one of us? Here’s a handy guide to determine whether you’re addicted to Target:

1) The first thing you look for in the Sunday newspaper is the Target flier.

2) You walk into the store and everyone yells your name like you’re Norm on Cheers.

3) The baby is five days away from needing more diapers and you justify that as a reason to go to Target today.

4) You fantasize about living in a Target fitting room.

5) When the Baytown Target replaced its old, faded shopping carts with the new, shiny red ones, you were deliriously excited but couldn’t tell anyone because you knew you would sound like a nut.

6) You miss a few days and Target’s manager calls, wondering where you’ve been.

7) Your blog is called “slavetotarget.blogspot.com.” (No, it’s not mine. But it’s cool!)

8) You named your children Merona, Mossimo and Isaac Mizrahi.

9) You keep adding to your registry at target.com and you’re not getting married or having a baby.

10) You win a two-week vacation to anywhere in the world and you pick Target.

If any of these are true for you, I’ll see you at Target later today. And tomorrow. And Friday, Saturday, Sunday ...