How to say my name
The problem is that my name is not Dee Anna Nail. It's pronounced "Deena Nahl." (Think "Dean" and an "uh" and "mall" with an "n.") In that weird moment in which a roomful of people were greeting me by a name that is not mine, I froze. I know now that I should have cleared it up right then, but instead I just said "hi" and sat down. Now I don't know how to let this group of people -- who I'll be seeing every Wednesday for the next eight months -- know what my real name is.
Then today. I'm sitting in the waiting room for my yearly grope session...I mean check-up... when a nurse walks into the waiting room and calls "Dee Anna Hall?"
I sat for a second, looking around to see if an actual Dee Anna Hall was going to stand up. She didn't, and the nurse called the name again. I cleared my throat and said, "If you mean Deana Nall, that's me." She looked very confused and went over to the receptionist desk where she found that my name had been entered into the system wrong. We got it all cleared up and then walked to an exam room where the same nurse said, "I'll be right back, Dee Ann."
I give up, people. Just call me whatever you want.
To add to the fun, the doctor was going over all the paperwork I had filled out and said, "Ummm... you believe you are severely depressed?" I said, "No -- did I put that?" He showed me where I had circled "yes." I had actually been trying to circle "yes" to the question directly above it, which was "Are you generally happy with your life?" I kept saying, "No, really, I'm fine." He was smiling and nodding with a look in his eye that told me he was thinking "Yeah, right."
One more thought. Have any of you ever seen a women's clinic NOT decorated with hideous, jumbo-print floral wallpaper? Just wondering.